Single Women, i.e., Menaces to Society

Ft. a traveler’s guide to Mexico City

I spent the last week in Mexico City and wowie—it may have been a top 5 city in my books!!

The food. The liveliness. The fountains. The nooks and crannies galore.

It was a jam-packed week with lots of sight-seeing and wandering.

Highlights included:

• A day trip to see the pyramids at Teotihuacan

• Watching a folkloric ballet at Palacio de Bellas Artes

• Checking out the impressive National Museum of Anthropology

• Vibing at the Frida Kahlo Museum and the surrounding Coyoacan neighborhood

• Roaming Roma Norte and Condesa

• Hitting the town with rando millennials

• Catching up with old friends on their home turf

CDMX reminded me a lot of Tel Aviv—really hip with poppin’ wine bars everywhere, street vendors, charming plant overgrowth, bro-y bartenders handing out unsolicited shots to take with you, and long tree-lined midrachovs (median strips) perfect for strolling. I felt like I could match the city’s freak pretty seamlessly.

A huge factor that deepened my enjoyment of the trip was the language immersion piece. I got around for the week speaking Spanish 95% of the time and it was such a fun challenge that made me feel really integrated. It reminded me of my study abroad experience in Paris where I activated my silly little French alter ego, and spoke much more melodic and sing-songy as an attempt to match the local phonetics (you can’t take the linguistics TA out of the girl). I was pleasantly surprised by my Spanish throughout the week, and decided to reinstate myself as quadrilingual at the end of the trip. “Quadrilingual” was a title that felt phony for years as my Spanish fell off from lack of maintenance, but a 1000-something-day Duolingo streak and this trip later, and we are so back!

Single women, i.e., menaces to society

Another thing I noticed—and have kept noticing since tour ended three years ago—is how deeply in my element I feel when I solo-travel. But, like… maybe too in my element for society’s liking?

Traveling across the U.S. alone at 22 made me hyper-independent. I fell in love with having nothing and no one holding me back from chasing adventure and new experiences. But then, inevitably, I start to feel a little down, because we’re still encultured to believe that being alone—especially as women—is a lesser way of being.

I often reflect with friends: this is the first time in history that women don’t need partnership to live a full life. One that’s financially secure. One that may or may not include children. One that’s rich in friendship and community. Partnership is no longer a necessity to survive—let alone thrive—and that’s a direct threat to the big hegemonic capital-E Establishment.

I have no idea what my life will look like in five or ten years. But the chatter has already started: that it’s time to “get serious,” find a partner, and start my life. But what if I’m already living it? What if my life is full now? Who should I trust—society’s warnings or my own gut? Is “everyone else is doing it” a good enough reason to settle down? I’m scared of getting left behind and thus growing apart from my loved ones, but how am I to know what the universe has in store for me? Am I supposed to do a rain dance to manifest conventional partnership and the societal benefits that come with it? What if I just let things work out the way they’re supposed to?

Maybe one day the rain dance will prove fruitful and I’ll find partnership, and maybe some day the whole biological clock thing will slap me silly, but today I’m choosing girlhood and freedom and adventure, to not rush through this chapter of life, and to double down on living a life that’s confusing to others. In the wise words of my new bestie, Frida Kahlo, viva la vida, or “long live life.”

Song of the week has got to be the throwback that is Coldplay’s Viva La Vida, no?!

Best eats of CDMX

I took the assignment of not-yet-influencing food influencer seriously last week, and practically doubled my caloric intake in pursuit of discovering the city’s best bites.

Without further ado, here are my CDMX superlatives:

Best breakfast: El Hidalguense—killer weekend barbacoa tacos

Best lunch: Contramar—the tuna tostada and the fig tart that live up to the hype

Best dinner: Limosneros—stunning interior and innovative bites like beef cheek donuts

Best street food: Tacos Los Juanes—buzzy late night spot dishing out excellent al pastor and suaderos tacos

Best views: Don Porfirio—hot chocolate overlooking the Palacio de Bellas Artes

Best pastry: Once Panaderia—top tier kouign amann that puts Dominique Ansel to shame

Best sweet treat: Churreria El Moro—CDMX’s bonafide best churros, freshly fried and covered in cinnamon sugar

Best splurge meal: Quintonil—current #3 ranked restaurant in the world (check out last week’s post for the play-by-play aka the plate-by-plate breakdown)

My favorite traveling philosophy

Even with all the amazing food and discoveries, I still sometimes fall into a scarcity mindset when I travel. You know the drill: I only have 5 days here, so I must eat 7 tamales a day to make it count! (Disordered eating? I don’t know her…)

What a year of nutritional therapy sessions taught me a few years back (fooled you—I do know her!) is that the scarcity mindset doesn’t serve me. I’ve learned that the magical nooks and crannies you fall in love with will still be there the next time. You don’t need to check every box to justify the trip. Be present, savor what you can, and let something linger for later. Leave yourself a bit of unfinished business—a reason to come back. The tamales will be waiting.

Food is one of the great joys of my life, and a big part of how I experience new places. I still hit it hard, but I’ve gotten better at trusting that what I don’t get around to now will still be there later—and that’s something to look forward to.

What I’m leaving for next time:

• Pujol (fomer #5 best restaurant in the world, and perhaps my next splurge meal)

• Expendio de Maiz Sin Nombre (a menu-less restaurant that harnesses creativity, keeps customers on their toes, and features fresh and seasonal ingredients—right up my alley)

• El Cardenal for an iconic hot chocolate x concha moment

• Visit the Chapultepec Castle for the panoramic views (not food)

• Take a gondola ride on the canals of Xochimilco (also not food)

I’m already day-dreaming about going back <3

Viva la vida/long live life,

Yael